Will swap for baby !

Please could someone lend me 6 grand for a fiesta ST150     Please . Will swap for baby ! LOL

Look around , not ahead . Ahead is already here

So what of next year ? I have no magical words or smart comments to sum up this next year . It will be a learning curve .This past year was a steep learning curve for me . I have never had a dull moment and have definitely found myself and others have found me too ! Its all uncharted territory now but ive a clue that not all is black and white and absolutes . Can i pull off another year like this ? Now this is exactly what i asked myself last year ! We underestimate ourselves greatly , i suppose its only natural ,the human condition .!Today is a no mans land and tomorrow is a new year ,though " time does not measure "   I went too a family party this week and sat and watched the now teenagers running around drinking and god knows what. Music booming from the basement..... and they have turned out OK .  It was surreal to see them growing up . I felt a definite chapter was opening or closing. Who cares which eh ? ( VERY JERRY CORNELIOUS ) Now this kind of mind set will set us free LOL !
 Its a dreary ,drizzely mild night . It seems to have been wet for months . I feel like buying something to cheer me up .Ebay calls again my friends . People have been very quiet this Christmas . Almost understated . What is this a sign of ? Somethings in the air for sure . I need to get out and watch the new Sherlock Holmes film this week . Its eay to get stuck in Dent like quick sand .

" NOT ALL WHO WANDER ARE LOST "

Attack of the nerds

I qued in Asda for phone credit behind the two most annoying people wearing anoracks and too short trousers , buying multiple lottery tickets jovially joking about Blackburn football club at great length. I was in a rush and only just bit my tongue.....  Nerds arrrrgh Kendal was full of em today ( and why is everyone driving in the middle of the road )

Better than sex

Today i bought a hot ham from Booths . Lots of crackling on it . I cut warm slices off it and had them in fresh bread buns. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm  . I will continue carving all week while watching films . This is heavan . Watched South Park christmas specials . What a laugh . It doesnt get any better......

If this applies to you.....

Tis a stormy disagreeable and most inclement evening i fear on this the eve of Christmas . The rain lashes as the wind it howls , and my mind doth wander so back down the winding path of this past year . I find i must most strongly suggest the seasons greetings to those who have moved my persons or made my lot most agreeable and pleasant up until now . One can only hope you all enjoy the Christmas you should so richly inherit .
 

Quote of the week

"  I HATE DICKENS  !  ALL THAT PSEUDO INTELLECTUALISM....    "             Go for it my friend !

Robin hood , Robin hood

I spent my birthday in Sherwood Forest buying a forage harvester ! Strange but true ..... 

Crazy world

 http://youtu.be/w4Fwf7fzx_A        A truly odd , bizzare , baffeling , day but im fine enough !         

The moon is so low and the sun  barely gets above the hills of Dent and its dark early . I have had my loose ends tied up for me   in time for Christmas  and the solstice ( this is good ! ) .Some times it takes  ages to get round to saying something then that person does the job for you ( result )    :  )
 What does next year hold ? Hopefuly a continuation of what makes me smile  oddly enough .The mind boggles......

Laura Tobin : )

Lara Tobin is hyping up the cold weather . Weather women hype up everything. " Cornwall will have a FAIR few showers...  " Wow      Shes looking very nice today so i forgive her.....  That ass...how can i concentrate on the weather . Put it away!!!

Are you local ? LOL

" They breed mainly in hedgerows , woodland , gardens and parks and can be quite aggressively defencive of their territory... "         

You could grow weed in there mate ......

Who has been making use of the redundant toilets in Kendal ? What good planning and intuition ! Well done . For once someone has thought outside the box . Someone please give the teenagers a decently paid job .They will go far if the money is there for'em !!!!!!!     WORKING SHOULD PAY FAR BETTER THAN CRIME UNTIL IT DOES I EXPECT WE ARE ALL DOOMED......

Why i love Lady Ga ga.....

Switched over next to Lady ga ga concert called  " THE MONSTERS BALL ! "   Errrr right .  Her music is good ,lyrics and videos unforgettable .  I think she shows her true self which takes some courage . She started the concert waring a tiny plastic bikini . She looked fantastic !  Yeah she's a star for sure , bless her !
   On viewing the rest of the concert ( i recorded it ) i think she maybe a little insane . But i still love her !!!!

Monster Club

http://youtu.be/eSAvIhOQVgU              I watched the most bizarre , quirky Hammer horror film last night called " Monster Club "  I must admit it started badly with a scene of a crowd of  monsters dancing in a night club complete with musical numbers played periodically through out the film by three different bands . The costumes were awful . But several very spooky stories were told by the vampire narrator ( VINCENT PRICE ) while he explained a monster breeding family tree chart thats  gives the results of various monsters breeding combinations and the bizarre results that occurred . Some of these were human crosses !   " The results are always disastrous "
 .One story was of a mans young son discovering his father was a vampire , not a night shift worker ! . The  next was about a film producer who was scouting for a location for his next horror film and  is trapped in a  remote village of ghouls and half ghouls . " All our food and clothes come from boxes in the ground !  " Says a young half ghoul .... Quirky and original . Never has a film swung from so bad to so good ! Certainly something different by the hammer studios and funnily it works with more than a few laughs .
  Finally the moon is low enough to be seen from my chair while i watch TV which is distracting cos it is dramatic as the clouds drift over it . Actually it looked precisely like a hammer film set ! LOL

Boscastle ..... ground zero ?

Die bad hairdressers die.....

Went to Kendal for a hair cut . I was greeted by a big woman who worked there who was half way through deying her own hair red ( what other colour is there ? )  I thought all had gone well until i took my hat off having got home and i realised half my fringe was 2cm shorter than the other side ! Did she just rush it or just give up thinking of her own hair situation . Who knows, only i managed to salvage something by a bit of a diy adjustment at home that went well .
  The last time i had a bad hair cut was before my wedding day . For months the same girl had cut it fine . Of coures youve guessed she wasnt there the day i really needed her . How f******* maddening was that ?
  Its a wild night up here and its gonna get wilder by the forecast .Hold tight !!!   I am increasingly pleased with The Golden blog .So much so i might make it my only blog . It gets straight to the point . Maybe a FACEBOOK page could replace this blog ? I dont know.....  :  )

Justin Bieber pa rupper pum pum....

After a night of failed communications i ended up in Kirkby Stephen Chinese watching Justin B perform for the first time  ( on the T.V ) . I have never seen such a load of rubbish . A mediocre singer at the best . It went further down hill as he was joined by rapper Tichy ,tiny something rapping about Christmas as Bieber started harmonising  " paaa rupper puuuuum  purrrrrrrrm ! "  He can barely sing ,but apparently hes worth BIG money . I know it was a full moon but nowadays the mediocre is presented as exceptional !!!

The condition of Muzak

Major Nye carefuly packed up the rest of the rations . " I wouldnt mind getting back to Blighty myself .Better the devil you know, eh ? A return to reality ."
" Oh Christ , " Jerry began to shiver again . Thats the last thing i need .  


Ive started laughing at my own blog .Is this un-cool ? ITS NOW DEC 2012 AND IM STILL LAUGHING AT THIS TODAY !!!!!!! ...... 21st April 2013  4am    still funny !!!!!!!

Romantic ????

http://youtu.be/Bm4YTs_Mr5M    

Yeah i couldnt have put it  any better myself  LOL

20 somethings eager to please

The weather forecasts have been dominated by attractive young women presenters of the ideal child bearing age grinning eager to please us with news of  " mild " weather . Unseasonably  " mild " weather .  One of the warmest Octobers in the past 100 years .

Cellar door

I am tired and weary and feel groggy and stuffed up and heart burn ect and a head ache while were at it .Its pissing it down and the clocks are going back . Cant decide on what to do this weekend though i am out tonight for a meal with friends . E very weekend there seems to be something on !
  Its been a  very busy week without a second to spare . Winter is nearly here and its about time . Kendal was weary this afternoon and Asda held no joys . Im weary . On a bright note i am recording hammer horror night again . I think November might be more productive . I miss  those good  nights last summer when i was uneasy but happy  . Thats summer for you . If i could turn back time ???  I really would  :  )    Now wheres that book ? The theory of ......     Ho , ho ,ho    

Cakes !

I must admit Olivias chocolate cake is one of the best or dare i suggest the best i have had made for me . I believe it must run in the genes judging by past offerings !

Mad as hatter

Yep top hats would be cool . Imagine the fun ! They would be large , dark and all men would have " character "    "   Evening ladies ! "   

Wild n wonderful days

http://youtu.be/YELls9QdqGk    Oh the memories .... Mk 1 Fiesta  , mad sound systems you could hear a mile away , daft trips tp Morecambe for no particular reason .   No mobiles , no facebook , no ipods , no blog !!!! How did we survive . Life was SLOW but moody and brooding .

Snap shot of now 7 .13 pm

Its a still mild Autumn night and the clouds are barely light up in the twilight . The  leaves are dry and its been a good day . Need to catch up again with some of you and find how things are going . Time flies and weeks soon become a month . This annoys me more as time goes by . Or does time not measure ????   :  )

My Grandad

Being a bearer at my Grandads funeral was a physically hard job . In fact the journey out of the church was really bothering me as the church was full and failure was not an option . A funny feeling when you doubt if you and your helpers can carry the coffin back out ! We could have used another 2 people as is the norm apparently . My Sister read a good piece and so did my cousin Shaun bringing back memories of our family picnics at Barbondale . Another daughter of a relation  was very brave after struggling to finish her reading due to tears but came back strong to finish it . Very impressive for someone so young at a stressful time.
  The best memories of my Grandad was when he used to take me with him on his roundsof Sedbergh private school showing me the science labs with  bottles of preserved frogs and mice etc ! Sounds odd but when your 5 years old it was pure magic . Also i used to collect conkers with him after a stormy night in the school grounds . I remember lying in bed at night when it was windy thinking of this . Collecting big snails was also a joy as i took them back up Dent and they escaped and are all over Dent know. My mothers garden bore the brunt though !!!!  They will be around long after i am gone LOL what a legacy to leave !
Any way times are changing and im quite happy today .

Bonfire of vanities

Its looking like the " family "  ( im having flash backs )  bonfire will be in a fortnight . It will be muddy , it will be boisterus and health and safety will be minimal . The traditional human sacrifice will not go ahead for the first time this year as who really belives in that stuff nowadays ! Atomosphere will be " agricultural "   A virgin will be burnt if we can find one though . Thats a big if.......

Of little interest to any one

Am i getting old or are the gruesome  photos on the front of all the papers of Gaddafi way to graphic ? I am genuinely shocked . Not nice for children to see either ( oh dear i am changing ) .
  Having a very good day fishing .Caught 2 decent fish on my new rod which is has a perfect action . Nice when  all comes together . Trying for a Salmon further down river when the sun goes down a little . Yeah a nice day as well and a  end of season salmon would set me up great .

Oral and anal !

Who the hell flossses there teeth ? Dentists suggest it . I suggest its unecessary , time consuming , awkward ,
fiddley and dirty . Who has the time . For the oraly anal only!!!  

A change of mood.......

http://youtu.be/wlkBt4MmSUM

Sin City Weekend

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKFLrTYKIXk
My blog this weekend is dedicated to Sin City . Whats it about . A dark humourous comic book style violent crime film with a strangely likeable villans .